Hello @Oliverrabbit!
I own a doe who used to be a lot like the one you're describing. When I first bought her, she was already several years old and had come from a home where she'd been severely neglected. She was extremely antisocial and aggressive. I would get bitten and scratched every time I reached into her pen for any reason. She refused to let me pick her up, brush her, or trim her nails. I had horrible scars on my arm from handling her.
It took over a year of careful handling and patience to get through to her. Now she hops to the cage door every morning to get snuggled. I used to nickname her "the little terror" and now she's easily one of my favorite bunnies. Here are a few of the things I tried:
1. Never startle her. Make some noise as you approach her area. It can be humming, talking to yourself, whatever you want. Just something that lets her know she's about to have company.
2. If you have a decent-sized yard (and a fence!) take her outside every day for an hour or so and just sit in the yard with her. Don't pet her, don't bother her, just
be there so that she gets used to your presence. Also, if she does approach you to sniff you/check you out, don't touch her! Let her approach, do whatever she wants, and then leave on her own. That way she learns that she can be near you without you grabbing her.
3. Provide some
safe treats while grooming her. (There's a few separate discussion threads on safe treats.) Make grooming sessions as short and as relaxing as possible. Also, grooming once each week even it's to just brush her coat for two minutes can help her learn that there's nothing scary about the process. If she acts overly stressed or scared, end the session. You can always come back and continue at a later time.
4. Like other animals, every rabbit is different. Some rabbits respond better to gentle handling than rough handling. Some like you to take things slow and careful, while others feel more relaxed when you are just open and direct. But one thing that is important is to never be timid around her. Animals are
very good at sensing your anxiety and then they get stressed out because they just sense something wrong. Do something relaxing before, during, and after interacting with her so you won't be as nervous or anxious about being around her. Play some music while grooming her, read a book while hanging out with her in the yard, etc.
5. Make sure she feels safe in her home. Maybe she's anxious and aggressive because she doesn't feel completely safe. What type of cage/hutch/pen does she live in? If she shares a cage, does she have a place to be where she can be by herself? If her cage is small, does she have a place to exercise? If her cage is large, does she have any sort of box or den to go into when she's scared? Any of things might contribute to stress her out.
6.
BE PATIENT. Can't emphasize this one enough. As I said, it took over a year to rehabilitate my aggressive doe. I'm glad I never gave up, because it turned out that she was actually a very wonderful bunny underneath all that stress and territoriality.
These are only suggestions of course. But they certainly helped turn my aggressive doe into a little sweetheart. I wish you the best of luck with your rabbit.
(P.S. Do you know what breed she is?)