Hi guys its been a while since I have been on here, life has been a bit overwhelming. 
As the topic says I have the potty training blues and was hoping maybe someone on here has some suggestions.
As some of you may remember, Ethan ( 3 next month) was born not breathing, and no heart beat. After that everything seemed to be fine with him, every wellness check up was perfect. Then at about 18 months he didn't seem to be on schedule for his age, not anything to bad, by 2 his language development was still behind, closer to that of a 12 month old than a 2 year old. His doctor suggested we contact our local Help Me Grow program to see if he qualified for therapy, which he did. He has been getting speech therapy for almost a year now, which has helped with his talking (sort of) he can now say 2-3 word sentences. His other issue is he doesn't like to talk to other people, not even his grandparents! He cant answer questions, such as his name or age for example, and he doesn't like to really interact with other kids (he has gotten better at this). He will eventually talk to his therapist and teachers a little, but not without a lot of prompting from them. He was given an autism test at 2.5 years old, at my request, he scored a 13, I was told 8 or below is non autistic, but she doesn't believe he is autistic, more of a social anxiety, but its something to keep an eye on and perhaps test again at an older age.
He now has to attend preschool since he is almost 3 and that is the only way he can continue with therapy, unless we want to pay for private therapy which is expensive. The school is fine for now with him not being toilet trained since he is on an IEP, but obviously they would like him to be potty trained as soon possible.
He goes to preschool from 12 pm -3 pm 4 days a week, during those hours, and at bed time he wears pull ups. All other times I put regular underwear on him. He has a potty chair and also a toilet ring that goes on our toilet so he has a choice of where he can go. I have tried every thing I can think of and he just refuses to use potty. He can sit on the toilet for 20 minutes and not go then you turn around and he is peeing in his pants. I have tried a timer, and treats neither is working so far, though we keep trying. The other thing is he doesn't let you know when he has to go, or that he has already went. (definitely not going to say anything to a teacher) Being dirty doesn't seem to bother him, he used to actually run and try to hide if I wanted to change his poopy pants, he has gotten a little better about that, at least he doesn't fight me so much anymore.
I just don't know what to do. Some parents of autistic kids have told me just to be patient and try again later, that he will do it in his own time, but I have people, like his pediatrician that act like it is all my fault he isn't toilet trained yet, like I am just being lazy and using his delays as an excuse. He is a sweet smart kid I just don't know how to get through to him on this.
As the topic says I have the potty training blues and was hoping maybe someone on here has some suggestions.
As some of you may remember, Ethan ( 3 next month) was born not breathing, and no heart beat. After that everything seemed to be fine with him, every wellness check up was perfect. Then at about 18 months he didn't seem to be on schedule for his age, not anything to bad, by 2 his language development was still behind, closer to that of a 12 month old than a 2 year old. His doctor suggested we contact our local Help Me Grow program to see if he qualified for therapy, which he did. He has been getting speech therapy for almost a year now, which has helped with his talking (sort of) he can now say 2-3 word sentences. His other issue is he doesn't like to talk to other people, not even his grandparents! He cant answer questions, such as his name or age for example, and he doesn't like to really interact with other kids (he has gotten better at this). He will eventually talk to his therapist and teachers a little, but not without a lot of prompting from them. He was given an autism test at 2.5 years old, at my request, he scored a 13, I was told 8 or below is non autistic, but she doesn't believe he is autistic, more of a social anxiety, but its something to keep an eye on and perhaps test again at an older age.
He now has to attend preschool since he is almost 3 and that is the only way he can continue with therapy, unless we want to pay for private therapy which is expensive. The school is fine for now with him not being toilet trained since he is on an IEP, but obviously they would like him to be potty trained as soon possible.
He goes to preschool from 12 pm -3 pm 4 days a week, during those hours, and at bed time he wears pull ups. All other times I put regular underwear on him. He has a potty chair and also a toilet ring that goes on our toilet so he has a choice of where he can go. I have tried every thing I can think of and he just refuses to use potty. He can sit on the toilet for 20 minutes and not go then you turn around and he is peeing in his pants. I have tried a timer, and treats neither is working so far, though we keep trying. The other thing is he doesn't let you know when he has to go, or that he has already went. (definitely not going to say anything to a teacher) Being dirty doesn't seem to bother him, he used to actually run and try to hide if I wanted to change his poopy pants, he has gotten a little better about that, at least he doesn't fight me so much anymore.
I just don't know what to do. Some parents of autistic kids have told me just to be patient and try again later, that he will do it in his own time, but I have people, like his pediatrician that act like it is all my fault he isn't toilet trained yet, like I am just being lazy and using his delays as an excuse. He is a sweet smart kid I just don't know how to get through to him on this.
