Overcoming the attachment factor with little kids

[Balog]

Hi all,

I've been looking to add some rabbits for meat to our little backyard farm. We currently have ducks for the eggs and a small veggie garden. My wife is reluctant to start with the rabbits, not because of the expense of getting started or the added responsibility, but because she's worried about their cuteness. We have two little girls (a 3 and a 2 y/o) and they've always went nuts for the rabbits at petting zoos etc. My wife is thinking that they'll fall in love with the soft n fluffies, and she's worried about how they'll handle it when dad turns their little buddies into dinner.

Obviously they wouldn't be included in the actual slaughter and butchering until they were older (if ever) but they're smart and observant and they'll know when all of the new rabbits we've bred are gone one day. Has anyone had to deal this? Both of our girls are little carnivores, and they've really liked rabbit meat when we've eaten it in the past. Our space is too limited to raise any of the larger meat animals like pigs, and while I eventually want to start hatching out some eggs and using our ducks as a meat source that's going to be a ways off. Some of the smaller breeds of meat goats are a possibility, but that's a level of butchering I'll need to work up to to feel comfortable with as well as requiring a larger logistical footprint in terms of their upkeep. Rabbits really are the perfect compromise, aside from this one issue.

 

[Zass]

One of the great things about rabbits, is that with a 31 day gestation, there are always NEW adorable baby bunnies to replace the missing older ones.

The kits come in batches of about 8 usually, so if you get a breed like cali or new zealand that are all the same color with no distinguishing markings, it can be pretty hard to pick out one rabbit from a litter to get attached to or miss.

 

[MaggieJ]

If your kids are indeed little carnivores and have knowingly eaten and enjoyed rabbit meat, then I would talk in their presence about raising rabbits for meat well before you get the rabbits.

At that age, kids are seldom critical of their parent's decisions -- they are willing to believe their parents are right about things. If you are matter-of-fact about your reason for raising rabbits, they will likely accept it without problems.

Naturally you will want to do the butchering out of their sight . . . although I remember watching my dad butchering snared cottontails when I was about 4 years old. I found it more interesting than upsetting . . . and yet I was apparently a sensitive, animal-loving kid.

 

[Balog]

Thanks for the comments!

I was raised on a small "homestead" back in the days before it was trendy, and my family just did it because we were poor. :lol: I think I was five or six when I saw a dog pull down our calf and helped my dad with the butchering. But my wife was raised as much more of a city girl, and while she has no theoretical objections it's still a squeamish subject for her.

 

[Rabbitdog]

Ditto what's been said above, especially the part of getting all REWs! My kids were all made aware of where their food came from very early in life (much younger than most, I'm sure). I would basically do a disection of deer for them to teach them the different organs, as well showing them the bullet damage to develop a healthy respect for firearms. Now, some 20 years later, they seem to be quite well adjusted young adults. Of course, we also limited the exposure to pop culture, as well (easily done when you homeschool). So "walt-disney-itus" never was a problem in our house. Animals don't talk to other animals and they don't ponder life/death. They are not people, rather they are people food. We feed them so that one day, they will feed us.
Whenever they eat chicken nuggets, fish or bacon, you need to remind them that they are eating animals that were bred, fed and slaughtered for their delicious dinner. Just because they didn't see it or do the actual slaughtering and butchering, doesn't mean it didn't happen. It happens every day and there is nothing wrong with it. Repitition will make it normal on your homestead. The earlier they learn this and accept it, the better suited they will be to deal with all of the tough stuff that life will throw at them.
Finally, you can make the point that you are producing healthier food for them than can be bought at the local supermarket (no growth hormone, no antibiotics, no artificial flavor, color, no poison, no preservatives, blah blah blah). Of course, in my world these things are at least partially responsible for many of society's health problems now. And you're willing to do all of the extra work associated with home food production/storage because you love them and want the very best for them! Good job Pop!

 

[Dood]

I agree that it would help if you raised all the same colour so the kids cannot easily identify "favourites"

I grew up on a farm and learned from a young age that the only reason we raised animals was to eat them and we were discouraged from naming, playing with or getting emotionally attached to critters destined to become food.

Some people let their breeding stock be regarded more as pets but I don't recommend this as one day they may need to be replaced. My dad made this mistake with us when our favourite sow failed to get pregnant and was butchered and he decided to keep the meat for the family - I wouldn't eat pork for a year and two of my sisters (in their early teens at the time) became vegetarians overnight and they stuck with it into their 20's

 

[Rainey]

I think it might be easier since your children are still so young. What someone else already said that they'll just accept it if you and your wife are really comfortable with raising your own meat Sounds like perhaps your wife has her own reservations and even if those are unspoken, kids pick up on them quite easily.
I grew up with extended family members who raised their own meat--pigs, steers, sheep, chickens--and it just seemed normal to me. I'm still puzzled by people who happily eat meat from the grocery store or at fast food places but feel squeamish about the idea that we raise pigs and rabbits for meat. Not only is the meat healthier given that we know what those critters were fed, but the animals we raise are treated so much better than those that most store meat comes from.
I don't get the part about naming either. We name our pigs and scratch their backs and talk to them and we enjoy the rabbits' different colors and personalities. We only name the ones kept for breeding because there are so many kits and always new ones growing out. But then when my daughter was little, it was the plants she felt sorry for. She followed behind me in the garden with her little trowel, replanting the weeds I pulled and explaining "everything should have a chance, mama" She has outgrown that long ago and is a great gardener and weeder. But I still remember her telling me she was going to live on gravel and berries and the outer leaves of lettuce "because when you pull up a carrot, that's its whole life gone" I think we've lost something important when people have no idea what food is, that life to sustain our lives and that food should be eaten with gratitude.
Sorry--didn't start out to write a sermon

 

[Dwc77]

I agree with all you guys very good points. My girls are a little over three and they love to play with the bunnies tho It can be kinda tough love :lol: .. When it's warmer they pull grass and help feed them. I tell them that we are going to eat the little ones when they get bigger they just say ok. Most of our bunnies are white but have had some colored ones to. When we eat rabbit they always want to know what color it was :lol:

 

[TF3]

I agree~ if they all look alike it is easier on everyone!
I have a 10 year old animal loving daughter and I was concerned about how she would do... she only attaches to the oddballs or stand outs, and even then she has accepted that there will be more to come after these faves go.
Before we had eaten any, she told me one day that she couldn't wait to find out how they tasted~ shocked me, but she meant it! She had put this much effort in, she wanted her payoff (and loves it).
At the age of your littles, you *could* just not specify the meat source if it is an issue, but if t is normal for your family, it will be normal for them.

And really, while 3-4 week old bunnies are adorable, I have found that most kids (we homeschool and have lots of kids of different ages visit) are NOT that impressed once they actually hold a rabbit and it doesn't act like a cat or dog.. or nibbles or scratches them. They all pretty quickly want to run and play rather than hold the scratchy fluffies

 

[Miss M]

Our kids were a little older when we had our first butchering day -- 8 and 13. Both were fine the whole time with raising that litter for meat, though we did allow them each to choose one to keep back for breeding. These were very colorful kits, and I was concerned how they would be once the deed was actually done.

When we let them come into the front of the house when we were finished, we knew everything would be fine when the first thing our son (the 8yo) said was, "Are we eating one tonight? When are we eating one?

Now they participate in butchering day. Our son dispatches, and our daughter helps skin.

 

[Zass]

Mine were 5 and 8 when we started raising meat rabbits.
Lots of color, names for the breeders, etc.

My daughter was the first to ask for a rabbit meal, and the first to bite in and declare it delicious. (She ate most of the first rabbit.)

My son was more resistant. I think, he would have gone the opposite direction had I not played my cards very carefully.

I made a promise early on that I would never ever kill an animal that one of the kids were attached to. I would, however, move it into their bedrooms until we found a buyer for it. :twisted:

They never seemed to want more then one rabbit in their room at a time, and I never had to be the bad guy and dispatch an animal that they felt some connection to.

After re-homing a few favorites (because they really didn't want rabbits in their bedrooms), the kids stopped picking out favorites.

My son still resisted eating rabbit for most of a year, declaring them "too cute to eat."

I think, what changed his mind was my family's practice of only eating meat that we raise, hunt for, or can source locally. We rarely actually buy any though. Mostly we have rabbit and venison, with occasional poultry.

Eventually when the deer ran out, his growing body started craving meat, like humans tend to.

I knew his resistance was finally gone one day when he insisted we have rabbit nuggets for dinner. Knowing there was no rabbit left in the freezer, I playfully asked if he wanted to go pick one out. Much to my surprise, he headed right up to the rabbitry and selected a likely looking youngster for our meal. "This one looks good Mom, we'll have him."

There was never talk about anything being too cute to eat after that.


We do have two house pet rabbits that are allowed to live (in pens) in our general family area. Those two velveteen lops have become the "attachment" buns that the kids are allowed to love and cuddle and not ever have to worry about re-homing or eating. Certain rabbits can be great pets.
Not all of them though.
Most of the rabbits we have raised have been too rabbit-oriented to really enjoy pet life. I think, they really do prefer living in the rabbitry, with the other rabbits to observe so that they don't get bored. There they get to do rabbit things, like and mating and making babies, and there are no scary human noises like kids yelling, video games or loud music.

What I'm trying to say, is that most meat rabbits will fall into the happier-in-the-rabbitry category. They won't behave in ways that would hold most kid's attention for long.

That may be part of why there are always so many craigslist posting that say: " rehoming this rabbit because the kids are no longer interested."

 

[a7736100]

I myself still have attachment issues. Not so much them being cute or not. It's very hard for me to kill one but I have no problem processing it after death. Even after one bites me I still don't kill it. The other problem is not being able to send them to the pet store. I make excuses like they are not paying me enough or they don't treat them well. It's really a problem because I like to breed them.

 

[michaels4gardens]

When my children were small they were carried around with me for part of the chores, gardening, and feeding, when they got older they had their own little bucket to carry to the garden, to help with harvest, and to take with them to "help" with farm chores, they "helped" with all of the chores including butchering, they all wanted to help, as children do, so I let them "help" with the things they could manage, like putting a freshly cleaned rabbit in the bucket of salt water. I always explained what we were doing and why we were doing it, and thanked them for their help when we were done. When the subject of naming farm animals came up I told them we did not name our food.[the milk cow was named] - when my oldest insisted on naming the calf, , I suggested he name the calf T-bone so he would be sure to remember where it was going when it was large enough.
I never had trouble with my boys-- however one of my daughters decided that she would not eat any of a pig she had helped raise, and made a fuss at the dinner table, -- I just quietly scraped it off her plate on to mine and put her plate back in front of her, after her shock was past, she quietly got up and got herself another piece, -- that was the last I heard about that...

 

[HansenHomestead]

Our daughter is also 3, and before we got rabbits we started with chickens, and from the VERY of having any sort of live animal we explained to her that no matter what type of animal we obtain that they are for food, and while it is okay to enjoy them while they are "here" they eventually will be our dinner one night. (Even my husband, and I have a hard time with dispatch at time emotionally, we know this is what we want, and what we have to do in order to live the type of life we want.)

While I know you stated that your kids will not be there for the actual dispatch, and slaughter, we have had our daughter with us while we dispatched a few chickens, and she even helped with a few quail, and explained to her the entire process what we are doing, why we are doing it, etc, and asked her very often if she was okay with that was going on, and that it is okay to not look, or that it is natural to feel a little sad about it. We have got backlash from some folks about her there while we did it, but for us we feel it is truly important that she understand all of it, and gains a deeper understanding for it as she gets older. We have yet to butcher any of our rabbits as we just got our first batch of litters, but we do intend on asking if she would like to be there for that as well.

I was more for her being present than my husband was, because my grandparents also raised animals for food, and while I sort of knew what they were doing I had never SEEN it, and I feel like now at this age it left me too tender hearted over the whole thing. I mean once they are dispatched I am fine, but to do the actual deed itself, I have not brought myself to doing it yet, and I feel that even though my husband will be doing most of the dispatch himself regardless I NEED to know that I can do it being that say someone gets greatly injured I do NOT want to have make that animal suffer until my husband gets home.

 

[michaels4gardens]

although it is a lot more difficult to "do the chores" with a small child in tow, -- it is more important to be a responsible parent , teach the life skills, and work ethic . I was raised with the saying-- "lazy moms pick up after their kids" -- yes, it is very much easier, to just do it your self, -- but,- we have a responsibility to teach our children to do things for themselves ... do we not??

 

[HansenHomestead]

I agree, my daughter collects all the water bottles, I refill them, and she takes them back to the bunnies, She checks to see which ones are out of food, and helps me pour the food into their bowls. Then we collect the quail eggs, and she puts them in the fridge for me. As for non-animal chores. She is in charge of picking up all her toys, gathers all the dishes, and puts them in the sink. She is also responsible for making sure that her bathroom, and bedroom is picked up daily.

 

[wamplercathy]

We give food animals, food names. Like bacon the pig, burger the cow. Our rabbits are called:
Cumin
Cream of Tartar
Rosemary
Mama and her son Taco.

We have kids here every weekend with an age range of 2-15. One of the regulars (5 yrs) even asked to watch the butchering but mom shut it down and told her she had to be 7 before watching. :lol: :lol:

It's all in how you raise them. If you allow the kids to think "pet" it will be a traumatizing experience for both the kids and you. Set down with them and talk about the animals and what their purpose is. The gap the average child has between them and where food comes from is sad. More parents should have these talks.

Anyways that's how we deal with the kids,
Cathy

 

[Balog]

I really appreciate all the help folks, thanks! I'm thinking I'll spend the winter reading up and getting a solid knowledge base, building out the hutches, and getting ready to go instead of just jumping in half cocked.

 

[wamplercathy]

I really appreciate all the help folks, thanks! I'm thinking I'll spend the winter reading up and getting a solid knowledge base, building out the hutches, and getting ready to go instead of just jumping in half cocked.

Thank you. I mean it. Thank You. I wish more people would do this prior to bring any animal home.

Here is a small list of fun reads that can be found at most public libraries:
1. "Stories Rabbits Tell" by Susan E. Davis and Margo Demello
Great stories about rabbits and their domestication.

2. "Storey's Guide to Raising Rabbits" by Bob Bennett
Great practical information

3. "A book of County Skills The Self-Reliant Homestead" by Charles A. Sanders
Wonderful red-neck ingenuity.

4. "Rabbit Housing" by Bob Bennett
Full of 'how to...' in making rabbit housing

5. "Barnyard in Your Backyard" by Gail Damerow
A beginner's guide to not only rabbits but cows, sheep, goats, chickens, and ducks/Geese.

Hope this helps,
Cathy

 

[EnglishSpot]

when Heaven had her litter i made sure both kids knew these babies names were "Dinner". they did not get attached to the babies these last 3 months but did enjoy them. earlier this week i asked my 10 yr old daughter if she wanted to know exactly when I was butchering the rabbits or if she wanted to just come home and find the deed done. she never answered me so today when she came home from school and found out she was banned from the garage since i was cleaning up and figured out what happened. we spoke later and she said that next time she'd like to know exactly when, just to see how she felt about that option too. my son said he can't wait for the next babies to be born in 2 weeks!! i told her how their death was very quick and that i had thanked each one prior to their death stroke.

i want my kids to know where their food comes from, but i also want them to have compassion for getting the death strike right, since a botch job can cause anguish for the rabbit and person doing the deed.