Acreage Advice for New Property

[Deer Heart]

A bit of a long story, sorry there's no real way to keep this short.

I have that new property I've been gushing about. It is a little over 4 acres. My mother is helping me a great deal to get everything sorted out. Basically, we got the lot extremely cheap (she found it and is fronting the money until my current house sells to pay for it). She has decided though that she wants to split it in two, taking away an entire 2 acres of the lot to re-sell. I would really rather keep the entire lot whole as the 2 acres she's wanting to sell off provides a large amount of privacy to where my house is intended to go as well as the perfect pasture for meat goats. (It is a large amount of brush, I'd also like to reseed it once cleared and try for Dexters and/or Alpaca) She was of the assumption it was way too much acreage for me to handle as a solitary person (Yes, I am all alone, I could see that) But I don't think it is as long as I take my time in growing my farm and stop if or when I feel overwhelmed. To not have the option for expansion upsets me a great deal honestly. But now the splitting is becoming more of a sell it so we can buy the house to put on my side sort of thing as it's taking almost a year now to sell my house for the money to buy my new house.

Is there any way I could possibly bring up not doing it without seeming like a complete ingrate about the whole thing? It isn't even about the money really, just her perception of what would help me the most. Less acreage to "Worry about" and if it sells faster than my house, I would get to move in that much sooner.

Worse yet, she hired a surveyor already to survey and split the land 3 months ago. They haven't even surveyed the land yet. So I feel like even trying to bring it up is asking to upset her.

(another reason I'm against the split btw is because our county limits "hoofed" animals per acre. Regardless of size. You can have 4 for your first acre and only one per acre after that. Meaning I can only ever have 5 goats - even if they're Nigerians. Or 2 pigs and 3 goats... or 1 pig, 1 alpaca, and 3 goats... you see my problem with this I hope)

 

[FourRingCircus]

What a tough spot to be in... not knowing the relationship and how it works, it's tough to offer advice on how to go about bringing it up. Could you put together a game plan? Print out or draw out the acreage and what you have planned for it. Sure, the short term financial gain would be nice, but it sounds like it would really limit you for what you were wanting long term. If it's a huge issue, could you just sell both sections and start over? Or mention to her that being a possibility if she sells the other two acres since you couldn't do what you were planning with the land? I don't know your current state personally, but I am guessing you aren't guaranteed to be alone forever... situations can change, and quickly! I wouldn't want to make major long term plans over one part of the situation that could change next month.

I recently took the satellite photo of our property and started marking it up with plans for what we want to do with it. We own about 2 acres, but some of it is a rental house, and another section is cow pasture for DH's gpa. He told us to start moving into that section since we're running out of yard space so we actually just marked out a new fence line that I'll probably start on this week. DH asking him for advice has helped make it his decision and not ours which makes it so much easier of a transition (the property was his parents, so we wanted to be respectful of what was "his" before it was "ours"... walking the fine line that is family land and relationships).

 

[Deer Heart]

It's tough. We get along really great. My biggest hurtle is the step father in all honesty. He thinks she does too much for me and my brother and isn't afraid to argue with her about it. There's no way I'd give up this land, it's perfect distance from my job, in a nice community, was really REALLY cheap, we had been looking for nearly a year before we finally found "the one". But then "he" sort of pushed for the division.

I really like your idea of showing what could be done with the land. I wonder if there's any way I could talk her into letting me pay her for the extra 2 acres.

 

[FourRingCircus]

It's tough. We get along really great. My biggest hurtle is the step father in all honesty. He thinks she does too much for me and my brother and isn't afraid to argue with her about it. There's no way I'd give up this land, it's perfect distance from my job, in a nice community, was really REALLY cheap, we had been looking for nearly a year before we finally found "the one". But then "he" sort of pushed for the division.

I really like your idea of showing what could be done with the land. I wonder if there's any way I could talk her into letting me pay her for the extra 2 acres.

I would definitely offer to buy the extra two acres, show her you really want it and you mean it. Maybe an agreed upon monthly sum for a while? If the step father is a hindrance get everything in writing. Sad you have to do it that way, but my grandmother has been taken advantage of to the tune of thousands upon thousands of dollars over the years.

 

[Marinea]

Yes, go to her with your plans and how dividing it would change the plans. Yes, get your agreement in writing- you fronted me $x and will be repaid when my house sells.

Most important, from my legal background, is to make sure the land goes into your name only. That would prevent so many problems- selling the land, any possible issues with your stepdad if something should happen to your mom, dividing the property. If your mom's name is on the deed, as soon as your house sells and she is repaid, get her to sign a quit claim deed to get her name removed.

Keep the business aspect as professional as you would with a stranger. If everything is in writing, it can save a lot of manipulation/guilt/anger later.


Good luck!

 

[imajpm]

Oh boy time for a chat. 4 acres is manageable. I have ten, and about 2 is in development. The remaining 8 are reserved for future projects (sheep oops more animals!), for privacy, and for investment purposes should I get ancient and decrepit and wish to move to town in a few decades. I might go with that angle. More land is always better. My main maintenance issue is too much "lawn" grass but that is being reduced. The longer brushy pasture (haha, weed field) takes care of itself. In winter there is little to do except shovel show and feed critters.

There is also no reason to build up the farm in one year so having extra land is good. First year I did the chicken house and yard. Second year I started on insulating the barn and building a nice big dog yard. This year I'll continue on the barn, plus add in a walkway in front of the house.

Depending on how tricky your relationship is, it's important that you let her know what your goals and plans are. It seems like she is making your plans for you. Mothers do that. Children have to stop them lol. My mom has done that to me so many times, not in something as large as a land purchase, but I know exactly what you mean. We have always solved these things but my mom is hardheaded and usually ignores all my attempts until an upset yelling match is required.

 

[FourRingCircus]

We definitely don't always do what our parents think we "should" do - especially now that we have our own children. Some semi-major decisions we mad without ever saying a word (opting out of traditional health insurance for Samaritan Ministries is the latest example... MIL was a bit :evil: to say the least when she found out). Parents will always be parents and try and do what they deem best for their children, but as generations change, so will priorities. My mom grew up on a farm, but is a total "city girl" now... she cringes at my lifestyle... does not care for it one bit. You can see the disgust on her face when I dump scraps out for the chickens or give leftovers to the dogs (because hers are absolutely not allowed to have "people food" - kibble only!). Oh, and chicken poop anywhere near living areas? Oh, the horror!

It's not like you are going to be mowing or upkeeping the whole 4 acres right off the bat. I mow about 1.5 acres (minus the footprint of the 2 houses and a couple other smaller things), but that's more than I prefer and I hope to start decreasing that soon (although it is my main "quiet" time... I put ear protection on and zone out. I can't hear anyone yelling, fighting, crying... they are all DH's at that point :twisted: ). ANd if some of that is pasture the biggest upkeep will be on fence lines, right? That's not terrible. Maybe some bush hogging once or twice a year.

I assume you are a capable adult at this point... but breaking those ties is tough sometimes.

 

[Deer Heart]

What mowing? All of it is buried under pine needles and leaf litter. I need to rake and seed if I want some, haha, maybe in a few years after the goats had their fun. My mother and I are cut from the same cloth. We are very "DiY" and while she loves planting and gardening, I love animals quite a bit more. We are both into the "Ag life", she is presently living on 5 acres and plans to die there. They have chickens which the step dad is more interested in than her. She has hydroponic experiments and several gardens, including a huge hoop-house greenhouse (uses hydroponics and fish once they figure out how to cool it down a bit) She actually gets excited when I express my plans (I brought it up to her with a list of my plans last night and intent to pay - it mostly started with a simple "Once it's for sale, what asking price are you interested in?" she said she's looking at all offers and so I expressed my interest in making one)

The main concern she has, as it turns out, was she was hoping to use the money for the house to go on my side since my current house has been listed for a long time without a single offer, not even a low baller. She was hoping once I was at the new place, a profit could then be made after my current house sells and less of a rush to sell it (also less awkward as no one would be living there and there's no animals in the way)

But I'm thinking that starting on pens at the new place should at least alleviate a lot of that. The dogs bark at people coming to see the house and slam on their pen doors and are a bite risk if people don't get the hint and try to go into or near their pens. It reduces the risk of animal theft from people (possibly ARA) coming to see my house as well as "that barn smell" (AKA, fresh poop/pee from the animals). But I'm still hesitant as we are talking rabbits, chickens, ducks, and dogs living about 30 min from me without a well. I could easily care for them daily as the new place is located 15 min from my job, with a feed store along the way, but anything could happen when I'm not living there (I will also need to cart several gallons of water from home or work daily).