maybe I'm mean...perhaps I'm not....

[ladysown]

The scoop

Had some people call me up whom I sold rabbits to two years ago. Two young does.
They are both currently without work.

Asked if I would take the bunnies back.

I said sure. I can do that. Arranged to meet them next week but they decided they'd rather drive up to drop them off yesterday. No food for them, their cage and stuff and that's about it.

They had run out of dollars to buy food and where rather stuck.

Today they call me up, can we come back and get the buns?

I said I needed to think on that a bit and sent them an email.

This is what I sent

I am somewhat at this point reluctant to give back the buns.

my reasoning as follows
1.the thinness of Bubbles (broken black otter). She's thinner than she aught be. It is readily apparent that she is the "underdog" in the relationship between these two does.
2. the fact that you made the difficult decision that keeping them was a financial burden, and that finding them something better would be better for them.
3. The fact that you said yourself you couldn't afford to buy them feed. This has me wondering what is going to be good for these rabbits long term. Rabbits, when one is struggling financially, can be a burden.
4. the fact that you've been feeding them a "junk" feed. Rabbits need good pellets more than they need treats. Straight pellets, feed "treats" on the side ..and that's what the feed with grains in it is...it's a junk feed that encourages rabbits to eat the treats before they eat their real food. It's like offering a child a meal with a candy in it....they'll eat the candy first, it's a given.
5. I am happy to keep them here. They may not live together long term as I have to consider the mental well-being of both rabbits. I so have someone interested in both of them but they need to go through my quarantine period first and then I need to make my final decisions on them.

all these things give me pause to wonder, as much as you miss them, is it the right thing? What is best for you and them long-term?

Please don't think I'm being mean or insensitive. I am really not trying to be.

Get your feet well back underneath you and if the girls are still here by then we can talk some more about what will happen with them okay?

I am trying to think long term for the bunnies first.

they were gracious in my decision to keep them. They are hoping I can rehome them together.
I'm thinking.. I know these buns.. they are less than two years old. I may just keep them for my herd. But the one girl will need some feeding up a bit. She's thin. The other is in excellent shape. Keeping them here would mean they'd be available for further down the road should they get their feet underneath them again....

I am feeling rather horrid about it all though...they've spent the morning crying and being sad, and when they were here you could tell this was a VERY difficult decision for them....



So what do you think?

 

[dayna]

Don't feel horrid. The fact that you are even considering keeping them so that maybe down the line they can get the buns back? That means you have a heart of gold.

Tell them to re email you in a couple months if their financial situation improves.

 

[ladysown]

thanks dayna... i feel a bit more... I don't know .. like I made the right decision...

 

[dayna]

I think you did. They are obviously struggling right now and it sounds like another mouth(s) to feed will add to their stress. Maybe they will be in a better position soon, you never know. It could have just been a bad couple of months, it is winter and the holidays, etc. Maybe they had some unexpected medical bills. Things happen.

But also things can get better! Sounds like it's too soon for them to really know if things are looking up or not yet so if you give them some more time, and maybe let them visit????

I know for me, feeding two more buns won't break my bank, but I do know people, many many people here on my Island, that struggle just to feed themselves.

 

[trinityoaks]

I agree with dayna. I think you made the right decision, as hard as it may be.

I think that letting them visit would just make things harder, though, and it will force you to keep them whether you want to or not.

 

[ladysown]

I won't be allowing random visits. They'll need to call first. And I promised them nothing long term, I just said we'll see where we are at. They both need to find jobs and find a way to play off student debt and bills. Once they go through quarantine I'll either add them to my herd for a while, or I will sell them. I will attempt to keep them here for a spell though.

 

[Mary Ann's Rabbitry]

I give them a thumps up in contacting you in the first place and asked you to take them in. I thought that was a very good thing for them to do. Because of that , in the near future when things looks up for them. I would sell them another rabbit . Things happens .

 

[Marinea]

I think you did the right thing. Bouncing the rabbits back and forth isn't good for them.

They get points for contacting you and not just releasing the rabbits, but I would want to see some time pass with things stabilized for them before trying again.

 

[sillysally]

I'm glad they contacted you to take the rabbits back, but I think you made the right decision for everyone involved--you shouldn't feel bad about it.

 

[420Rainbow]

It sounds like you're trying to control a situation that you can't control. Do you think that those people will just be like "ok, we have our cage and set-up and know what to do, we'll just sit around and listen to this person." No, they will most likely look elsewhere for a rabbit if they cant get theirs back from you. I know you probably won't care about that, but it seems a lot of fuss over one being smaller than the other (impossible not to happen) and two people making a responsible choice. Idk anyone who would listen to you, everyone I know would politely ask and after being refused, would do it anyway. That's just human nature.

 

[Frosted Rabbits]

You did fine-- many people don't honor the "first refusal" they adamantly demand!!!

Heck, "Charlie" is still here--and he isn't even something I produced...

 

[MaggieJ]

Ladysown, you acted in a most ethical and compassionate manner. The welfare of the rabbits must take priority over feelings of loss of these folks. They showed responsible behaviour in asking you to take back the rabbits, but unless their situation has taken a sudden change for the better, they need to put aside their own feelings for the time being, get their lives back on track and then contact you to see if the rabbits are still with you.

 

[Whipple]

Kudos to them for contacting you. And kudos to you for being so incredibly considerate. No other option would even allow them to get them back. So I do hope they figure things out. It could be ad simple ad cutting cable or whatever. But if they really want the buns they will figure out a way.
Also, are they aware that good food will cost less than treats?

 

[Heritage Homestead]

I think you handled it fine. Thumbs up!
You did what was best for everyone. Glad the people understood and didn't give you trouble. Some people don't understand when an action is in the best interest of all involved.

 

[Mickey328]

I wouldn't feel horrid. If they couldn't afford them one day, how is it they can the very next? Doubtful, methinks. I think you did right by keeping them.

 

[OneAcreFarm]

I think you did the right thing...

 

[tailwagging]

I guess I am different.
They clearly LOVE their rabbits by the way you posted about them. ..Life happens...
If I had cage space I would give them a month to get things together, pay me for food they ate and give them back.
by that time they may have found a family member to take them or found a job.... or find that they are better off without them.
either way they will be taking up that cage space (quarantine) unless you are going to eat them

I am not trying to make you feel bad.. truly I am not... I just would have done it differently.

 

[ladysown]

oh heavens.... if they had called me back two weeks later and said "I HAVE A JOB!" then sure you know what...take the rabbit back. But the next day, no situation changed.... I cannot justify giving back rabbits. I know I did good, but sometimes it doesn't feel that way for the short term.

As it turned out unfortunately...The does needed to be separated due to severe bossing/beating by the dominant doe on the submissive one. The submissive doe is doing well, just a lovely girlie, and has healed up fairly well from the beating she got. The dominant doe disliked being separated and went into a blue funk for a day (continued to eat well was just very sad acting), then tore around her cage as if badly frightened and I'm fairly sure had a heart attack. I had kept them housed next to each other as that has worked well in the past when separating young does who like each other but can no longer live together. Gives them the togetherness they want, but keeps them safe.

 

[tailwagging]

Oh I didn't mean that I would give them back the rabbits with out a job! unless they had a family member to take them.
I just would have made it clear to that they had a chance in a month to get back their loves.