Wanna B Homesteader

I was lying in bed with Tristan, exhausted after only a few hours’ of sleep. Caelin woke up and went into the living room. Then I heard something that made me very happy and very sad all at the same time.

“Oh, WOW!”

“Ooooh!”

“Preeetty!”

I decided to go for happiness that he was enjoying it this much, and got up to show him all the little things I had done for him….mainly, a “computer” station in his room where he can play the computer, but Tristan can’t get to him.

He is pretty happy.

So I have spent the night awake, cleaning. Again. But this time something is different. This time, I am taking everything out of the rooms that don’t need it, and anything not needed in the house will go into the very last room, what once was my room. I have an office/kid’s room. This is where my computer, our clothes, and the kids toys are, along with the boys’ bed. The next room is the livingroom…which is the fireplace, laundry, and hanging out room, basically. Not much in there. I don’t anticipate spending much time in there at all, at least until hubby comes home. Then there is the kitchen, which will be strictly for food, dishes, and sitting on the floor and eating. No more eating in the other areas, because I am tired of my carpet being stained and I no longer have a dog willing to eat the floor clean. I WILL have to mop every day, though, to keep the kitchen clean. then is a hallway, which leads to the bathroom and the master bedroom…but the master bedroom will be storage.

I have done this for a few different reasons…

1) I am tired of looking at it, thinking about it, and waking up each morning to find that yes, the mess is still there. When I come home, I have to deal with it. When people come over, I am ashamed of it. I am tired of stressing over a stupid house. I mean, come on, I am going to get gray hair if I don’t change it.

2) I don’t want my kids growing up embarressed to invite friends over.

3) I want DHS out of my friggin hair, and although I know for a fact that it is not bad enough to take my kids (they know it, too) They are hovering, showing up, watching and waiting for me to screw up good enough to take my kids for some retarded reason. So I am going to give them ZRO reason to be involved, and they can kiss my —. So there.

4) If and when I get another dog, it’ll be a puppy. Puppies are A LOT of work, and I want to be certain my brain is clear enough to care for the little chewy monster.

5) My husband is coming home someday, and I would LOVE to invite him into his castle, clean and relaxing.

There are a few things I am worried about when the boys wake up tommorrow. I am worried that they will see the house and want to tear it to peices. I am planning on taking them to church, then naptime, then outside playtime to keep them busy. Because my house is always messy and I am always thinking about cleaning it up, they don’t get outside much. That is going to change, now.

Uh, I guess that’s all I am worried about.

Some things I am excited for are:

1) Getting to relax about leaving, knowing I will come home to a clean home.

2) Being able to cook with out being cluttered by things on the counters! I can’t wait. I hate being in a messy kitchen more than anything.

3) feeling like I have time to sit with the kids and work with them.

4) NOT stressing out about people dropping by.

5) everything being SUPER easy to keep clean, since there is such a reduced amoutn of things in our living space to get messy.

I will be updating this with pictures in the morning.

So I want ten little monsters. I love the little devils, and once I figure out how to make them behave, and get the money to pay for more, I would love to cram my house full of them. Hubby, on the other hand, has always said he only wanted two. When we had a second boy, he said three….only to try one last time for a girl, and that would be it, either way.

Wellll….I was talking to him today (via email) and he was telling me he likes the idea of ten!!! This just MAY have something to do with the fact that htey are with me, and not in his hair all day, but I’ll take it! And I hope to have the boys under control by the time he comes home…because then he can see that kids DO NOT mean the end of sanity.

I am so excited!

And, I mean, I want to wait a while for another little monster…but I was so sad thinking he was going to draw the line at one more. I am thrilled that he has rethought his position, and hope it means I can get at least six out before he says “stop”. LOL.

I have had a struggle for most of my life to maintain a clean home, room, whatever my living quaters happen to be at that time. I don’t believe it’s because I am dirty…although I am lazier than many. I spend too much time on the internet, and The rest of the time I am being goofy with the kids. I LOVE hanging out with my kids most of the time, and when I am NOT, they are in trouble. So instead of say, moppin g the floor when they spill something on it, I grab them and haul them into the bedroom, where we play Simon Says, or whatever. Night is swiftly upon us, and it is bedtime too soon. Then, I lay down with the kids…I maybe turn on a movie, to while away the time. I inevitably fall asleep…I wake up with the kids, and my houses messes that I had intended to clean the night before are still there. See a pattern? Because I am busy with the kids, my house becomes a mess. Because my house is a mess, it is assumed that I am messy. Because I am “messy”, I must be neglectful….so one day I get tired of the assumptions and I clean the house. Trouble is, by that point it is pretty bad and I MUST ignore my kids to get it done. Once it is done I am exhausted and cranky for a few days. And the cycle starts again.

These are constantly misplaced, and messy. I can’t keep up witht he simple chores, or actually, I choose not to, I guess.

What is the cause of this awful cycle? What can help me manage? I rightly realized I had too much on my plate. I did what I thought I needed to, which was cut back on internet time (a good thing, to a point) and find a new home for my dog. I do regret doing that, as I feel like I have now found the REAL reason. And it was not my dog.

The problem is that I am simply too rich. Confusing, I know, when I am unable to pay my bills or buy things at all.

But the fact of the matter is that “things” are all too easy to come by in our America. They become easily disposable, because they are so easily replaced. Too many things creates, in my mind, more of a sense of entitlement that government welfare. Too many things clogs our minds and our homes. I can’t tell you how many times I have sat and looked at everything cluttering my home and thought “screw it” , and got on the computer. Perhaps that is at the root of my internet “addiction”…time will tell. All I know for certain is this: this weekend I purge. Toys, clothes, things in general. Nothing is safe. Most things will not be thrown away, but will be stored in the unused bedroom in my home, in case I need something out of it. I would need to be able to find things.

I do not anticipate gettig into the bags that will be back there. I imagine that this is the problem. I am too rich.

So this has been hard for me. I don’t particularily LIKE being within arms reach of my toddler 24/7, but it works. He has calmed down. It is A LOT of work, but I can see it being worth it long term.

I will continue with it, and see how it progresses.

Caelin has been fighting me HARD. When he misbehaves, he sits right next to me on a stool, and has a chance to try again in three minutes to do what I asked. Took him more than half an hour to pick up a few toys in his bedroom with me there, but once he was done, he glowed with pride. But basically, it is hard for us both. He  sneaks out of whatever room I am in, and sinceI am not spanking for everything anymore, he is going wild.

Ay two, he is beligerent, mean, spiteful, and spoiled. Go figure.

But I am tired of being angry at him, and tired of hearing everything said about him. I am tired of knowing he is the way he is because of me. So I will continue, I mean, how could Ifail him by NOT?! If I allow him to grow the way he is at this point in time, he will be just like everyone else his age, and I WILL NOT let that happen to him.

Wow, today’s Bible study really hit home for me. Did you know the most common commandment in the Bible is to not be afraid?

Actaully, it is interesting, in that just recently I was directed to a verse “be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed, for the Lord thy God is with you withersoever thou goest”. It’s in Cor.

It is amazing to me to realize how I DO live my life in fear. I shouldn’t. I should stand tall and be trusting that no matter what happens, God will be there for me. Period.

So Tomato Staking is basically keeping your kids RIGHT beside you all the time. You keep them RIGHT beside you as you watch them like a hawk, to be able to correct EVERY little minor infraction they do. Eh….it seems like a lot of work. BUT…with my track record, I need to do something different. Basically, I was a very permissive mom of infants, let them do anything they wanted at all. Until Caelin was two, he had free run. I wanted to be a better mom.

Then I woke up and saw the terror I had created. And I swung the other way. I started spanking him, which is not what I wanted to do, ever. Now, I see that he became violent when I began punishing him.  want to go back. I want to change.

This Tomato Staking should help me teach my sons how to behave, how to be respectful and obediant, while having fun and getting a lot of mommy time, since they are constantly next to you. I will be following our progress on here, to record the effectiveness of the “method”.

You can find the website at raisinggodlytomatoes.com

After spending A LOT of time on other blogging homes, trying to decided which was my favorite, I realized…this is it. I love this one. So I am back .

I hope to have quite a bit of things to blog about, as I am revamping my home, my parenting, and my rabbitry. I w2ould feel honored to have you folks along…:)

SOOOO…..realized I haven’t been posting on here…in Ages, really, and I thought it would be good to throw a post out into the blogging world. My rabbits are now in a colony, and Spooky thinks she owns the roost. For being half the size of the other two, she sure is bossy. I probably won’t be posting on here, anymore, since tmy computer screen got stolen and the one I am borrowing from my gramma is weird, so I can’t read as I type, which bugs me. I will post a link to my new blog home.